Brace yourselves, kids – the first tropical storm of 2006 has been named Alberto. That's a name some of you should remember – it turned the 4th of July weekend in 1994 into a major disaster for Georgia crops and out-of-town visitors (like me). It also contributed mightily to disharmony in the Benson family – 3 days of playing cards guys-against-girls is never a good plan, particularly when your little sister rubs it in when her side wins by high-fiving your stepmother and dancing around the table – but I digress.

It's worth mentioning at this juncture that Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth actually failed to mention some of the most damning information about the 2005 hurricane season. Not only did the 2005 season produce Katrina, far and away the most ruinous natural disaster in the history of the country, it also produced more Category 5 hurricanes (four) than any other season on record, and three of the top six (!) strongest Atlantic hurricanes ever recorded. 2005 saw more storms earlier than any other year, and was responsible for a completely unprecedented $100 billion dollars in damage. Furthermore, 2005 also produced three of the top ten most costly insurance loss events to have occurred in the world (reference) since 1970.

Say it with me: GLOBAL WARMING IS A THREAT TO AMERICA AND IT'S OUR OWN DAMN FAULT.

Don't just take my word for it. If you haven't seen An Inconvenient Truth yet, get thee to the Tara Theater (or any other place you can find that shows it) and bring some alcohol – you'll need it.